Monday, July 2, 2012

Stripping through the Graveyard: The Orgy of the Dead Mega Review, Part 6

What is this?  Read this: Simon Bar "Cinema": Orgy of the Dead

06: The Mexican Dance


Black Ghoul and Criswell Introduction

Criswell: And what is this? (holds up a skull)
Black Ghoul: A symbol, master.
Criswell: What kind of symbol?
Black Ghoul: She loved the bull ring and the matador, she danced to their destruction, now she dances to her own destruction!  Her dance is off skulls!

Then the Black Ghoul tosses the skull onto the dirty plywood scary cemetery grounds, in what has to be the most wussified throw ever made by a member of the dark underworld.


Uhn!  Did it make it the two feet to the graveyard?  I was aiming for the mummy!

Ed Wood Crazy Talk Grade: C-
Evil Athletic Ability: F, must attend evil forces training camp
Generalization of Entire Culture: A+

Sexiness

We can only gauge by the reactions.  The victims still aren't sure if they should be mildly concerned by the going ons, or if they should be kind of, maybe, frightened.

Criswell seems to be thinking about what to have for lunch.

The Black Ghoul seems like she's trying to remember how to breath.

Horse-hair Werewolf™ and Laundry-Remnant Mummy™ are being all buddy buddy.  I kid you not, it's very, very far from what is expect of creatures of the night.  Were strippers the long sought after dual purpose monster weapon?  Does it work on both Werewolves and Mummies, or only stage hands in really cheap costumes?

There's a great moment where Criswell leans in as if to tell the Black Ghoul something and ... nada.  Ed Wood didn't direct, he's not to blame this time!

Grace

It was ingenious to use the skull as a substitute for a sombrero, allowing the woman could pull off a grade school hat dance learned by mimicking the moves from an Tom and Jerry cartoon.

Did I say ingenious?  That might have been the wrong word.  Horrible stain on the very fabric of history?  I think that's what I meant!

Closeness to Theme

It's a good costume, for sure.  Everything else in this dance was pretty awful but if you can't find a gaudy faux-Mexican dress in LA, you're not looking hard enough.

Music

Castanets and piano.  Like most of the music in this fright fest of flesh, it's eventually rudely interrupted by either the sound of a blaring trumpet or a loose wire on the horn of an old Chevy Cutlass.

Length of Act

3 minutes of skull kissing, skull stroking, and skull cavorting.  Skeletons and/or skulls are a bunch of lucky bastards in the world of Ed Wood!

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